Monday, May 1, 2017

May 2017 Writing Challenge, Day 1: Tiny

Tiny is a word that would never ever describe me.

I was a few ounces short of 10 pounds at birth. And while I was a kid that was smaller in stature than others in my class, I definitely was not one who could ever be mistaken for little, petite, teensy, or any other adjective that was synonymous with small. But I think there was purpose behind all that: I was never meant to be someone small.

Even as a smaller child, I was a presence -- and that isn't meant as some sort of braggadocio. I really was just one of those people who wasn't going to blend in at all.


Sure I got larger and larger (too large) in size for years on end. Then I lost a ton of weight. I've put some of it back on. And where I am right now -- I could stand to drop 40-50 pounds, but I'll never be back to my smallest (about 8 years ago) -- BUT I AM OKAY WITH THAT.

There. I said it. 

At my tiniest, I felt tiny, and not in the good way. I was (and am) still a presence, but I felt lost in the woodwork. I felt invisible. As much as I joke that I'd like to just blend in, that I'd like to simply be unnoticed, it's not going to happen.

I was not born to blend in. I was not born to be small. My heart, my soul, my passions, my personality are all large. No matter the size of the shell, I am large and in charge.

I am just not tiny in any way. And I'm great with that!